ah. what a strange place. a strange notion. a strange feeling.

here i am though. battling through the first weeks. pinching myself often to see whether i still exist. i miss eva. i miss germany. i miss being wrapped in the safety of 8 layers of clothing and not knowing.

i was excited about knowing people again, but then i’m not sure that i do. people and times change. everything feels familiar, but isn’t. no-one wants to see the photos, and i understand. except that i need to reassure me that it exists, and that i haven’t just lost a year of my life. that there is a reason that everthing feels so far away.

it can only get better i guess.